Someone, must have stood in front of a mirror at midnight and said, "Filthy Cheater, Filthy Cheater, Filthy Cheater" because Tiger Woods has reappeared...with an apology! Tiger Woods staged his first press conference after his one car pile-up and the uncloseting of dozens and dozens of mistresses/cocktail waitresses. Tiger's Mama and Mama-in-Law watched from the sidelines during his choked and misty-eyed explanations. Elin, however was nowhere to be found at the time and rumor has it that the young, blond wife refuses to be photoged with her way-ward hubby...making him slightly less prestigious than past photo co-subjects like the Grand Canyon and the World's Biggest Ball of String. Tiger claimed that Elin had never struck him...we suppose burning a man's scrotum with icyHot isn't EXACTLY hitting.... Tiger capped it all off by saying that he will be returning to the religion of his youth-Buddhism, in hopes of improving his failing character and judgement. A pretty good apology in all, but sorta reminiscent of a weeping Jimmy Swaggart sometime circa '87. Except that instead of Jay-sus helping the guy keep his johnson in his slacks, it seems that Buddha will be doing the heavy lifting. Which is pretty ironic since Buddha is the nekkidest deity of them all.
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